Pubic Hair

Let’s be honest about pubic hair.pube-4

I first became confused about pubic hair when riding the bus and hearing some girls make fun of another girl for having “a bush”. (I’m not sure how they knew…) I can’t remember exactly how old I was, but I think I was between 14 and 15 years old. I am ashamed to admit that I laughed along. But inside, I was so confused. I had pubic hair too! The puberty video they showed us in 5th grade said we would grow hair “down there” and it was a normal part of growing up.


I learned that they shaved their pubic hair off. This terrified me – putting a razor that close to my vulva was the last thing I wanted to do! It was almost as scary as the idea of asking Edward Scissorhands to sculpt my pubic hair. I let my hair grow.


I remember another conversation with those same girls asking each other if they were “shaved or striped”. I didn’t know what striped meant (and to be honest, I’m not sure I know to this day… is it a landing strip? A striped pattern? Something else?) All of the other girls answered shaved so when they asked me I answered the same way. I didn’t want to be the nasty bush girl.

The same pattern repeated itself when we watched the Miracle of Life video in class – everyone seemed so disgusted that the woman giving birth had pubic hair. I went along with the rest of the crowd, but I remember thinking, “Why is it such a big deal? And what woman would want to shave when she was eight and a half months pregnant?!”

Click the image above to see a performance of the vagina monologue about hair.

The next time I actively thought about pubic hair was in college when I saw a performance of Eve Ensler’s Vagina Monologues for the first time. If you haven’t seen a production, there is one monologue about a woman who doesn’t want to shave her pubic hair but her husband really pushes the subject. The woman performing the monologue stated that pubic hair is “there for a reason”. In my head, I was screaming “PREACH!”

I’ve talked with several friends during and since college and I think we just don’t talk enough about pubic hair. So here I go!

I have tried several different styles ranging from full bush to fully shaved. I’ve never waxed because I’m terrified of the idea. Personally, I get a little itchy with a full bush. On the other hand, fully shaved makes me feel like a little girl and there is no itch worse that when it starts to grow back. And the worst thing that ever happened to me from fully shaving was an ingrown hair. OUCH!


What works for me is trimming the hair that grows on the mons and labia with scissors. In college, I used small blunt children’s craft scissors. I have tried multiple things, but I find that nail scissors work best for me because they are small and easier to control. If I’m going to wear a bathing suit, I usually shave my bikini line – just so I don’t have pubes poking out the sides. But only if I feel like it! And if I’m feeling really adventurous, I sometimes shave the labia (but seriously, this happens once a year at most). I’ve been sick for a few weeks, so I haven’t done any trimming and am rocking a full bush as I type this.

pube-7Here are some points I really want to make:

  1. There is nothing weird about having pubic hair. It grows there for a reason and if you choose not to remove it, you aren’t the only person in the world who lets it grow.
  2. There is nothing weird about removing your pubic hair. If it makes you feel more comfortable, then that’s your jam.
  3. Your body, your choice. Please don’t ever let someone talk or shame you into removing your body hair. I have an amazing boyfriend who reminds me of that when I feel the occasional pressure of social constructs telling me to shave.
  4. I still don’t know what “striped” means and I would love to know! If you have the answer, please comment or send an email to I’ll share your answer with this post, but you will remain completely anonymous.

That’s all for now. What are your pubic hair experiences? Were you ever confused about it? Have you waxed (what was it like)? How do you wear yours now? If you’re comfortable sharing, I’d love to hear from you!




Lady Bits

Let’s be honest about female anatomy!

oitnb1This is the best place I can think of to start because it is very common for people to know surprisingly little about the female genitalia. I’m not going to be talking about internal reproductive organs (e.g., uterus, fallopian tubes, ovaries) in this entry. Those things were covered in my high school class, and I am willing to bet that people are taught more about those parts than they do about the external parts. For instance, there are quite a few full grown adults who don’t realize that you don’t pee from your vagina. There are actually 2 holes! I love that this was addressed in one of myoitnb3 favorite shows – Orange is the New Black [season 2, episode 4]. It is a Netflix show, so if you haven’t seen it, you can binge all episodes there. To be honest, I didn’t know much about my own genitalia before my first Human Sexuality class – halfway through college. I had never even taken the time to look at it properly!


Because I’m not an expert and I know there are far better sources than me to give you the brief overview, I’m going to refer you to a video from Dr. Lindsey Doe’s Youtube channel, Sexplanations. A good friend of mine told me about this channel, and it is one of my favorite things. If you have some time and feel clicking around, I highly recommend her videos!

Anyhow, here is her video about the female anatomy:

Click image to watch

oitnb2If you have never done so, I would also like to highly recommend that you take a minute to look at your own parts. You can use a hand mirror, a small compact mirror, or even stand over a full-length mirror, with one foot on each side. If I’m completely honest, I found it a bit unsettling the first time I looked at my own vulva. I almost felt like I shouldn’t be looking. But the more I looked, the more comfortable I became with my own vulva and the more I appreciated what I saw.

I’m not saying you have to love what you see or even find it fun to look at, but it is really important to know your own anatomy. Know what is normal for you. Become comfortable with yourself! If you remain unconvinced, I’ll also point out that if you know where your clitoris is, you’ll be able to masturbate more successfully and it will help you have better sex.




If you had told a younger version of myself that I’d start an anonymous blog about sex, I’d have thought you were crazy. I was brought up in a very conservative environment where those things just weren’t talked about. It was inappropriate. I got the “puberty class” in school and a brief moment with my mom after my first period, but that was it.

Going to college helped me to really discover what I actually thought about a lot of things instead of what I was raised to think. It was after a Human Sexuality course in college that I masturbated for the first time–at the age of 21.

It took me a long time to realize just how many girls go through the same nonsense that I did: not being taught enough about their bodies, always wondering what is “normal”, and being afraid to talk about anything pertaining to their reproductive organs or sexual desires.

I am writing this because there are a lot of completely natural things that we don’t talk about or that we lie about in order to feel like we fit in. This creates a culture of fear or embarrassment around our bodies and our sensuality. I wish someone had talked to me about pubic hair. About vaginal discharge. About sexual desire. About orgasms. About masturbation. About consent. About sex. And so much more.

So if you also wish someone had talked to you about something, perhaps you’ll relate to this blog. If you stumbled onto this blog looking for some sort of answers, I hope you find them.

If you have thoughts as you read, I’d love to hear them. Leave a comment or reach out to me at